I just spent an hour in the car with my teenager teaching her how to drive, well actually how to not hit anybody while she is trying to learn to control the car. Believe me I AM NOT the person you want teaching you how to drive a car. I am actually a good driver having learned the fine art of defensive driving on the streets of L.A. I also picked up some very bad habits I have been unable to shake as well. But I digress. As we made the turn back onto our street I am immediately put back on this street but at a time long ago but what seems like just yesterday, watching her so proudly and a bit wobbly riding her bike for the first time without her training wheels. She rode onto our cul de sac with so much confidence and pedaled her bike right past all the kids on the street who were all about her age and some just slightly older, who had yet to learn to ride a two wheeler. Their mouths agog as she rode past like it was nothing. The next day those kids were outside having their training wheels taken off.
And now here I am all these years later teaching her to drive a car. Time goes by so quickly and before you know it your kids are not kids anymore but adults themselves busy with their own lives. I suggest that we can’t waste precious time arguing over things that we may not have a lot of control over. The time and money spent on attorneys could be used to spend time with our kids on vacation – maybe Disney World (which is awesome no matter what your age). I would much rather be sitting on a beach somewhere or riding a roller coaster and watching the sheer and utter joy on my child’s face than spending that same time and money in a courtroom arguing over time and money that may or may not get me anywhere.
I do understand that sometimes you have no choice, but there are so many things you can do to try to resolve things before it gets to that point. I also realize that some people choose to litigate as a means to vent their anger, frustration and hurt, again wasting time and money that could be spent on the few fleeting moments we have with our kids. So before you head down that road, before you pick up the phone to call your attorney, before you file yet one more pleading, think about this, 20 years from now would you rather look back at a photo album full of great memories of time spent with your kids or a box full of old pleadings and memories of time spent arguing over your kids.
I choose the former.