When I was younger, before I was married, my ideal man was fairly simple:
1. He had to be hot (to me that meant long hair musician)
2. He had to have a job (any job was fine with me – I fell madly in love with a guy that worked at the car wash)
3. He had to have a car (it didn’t matter what kind, the nicer the better but I wasn’t picky)
4. Was willing to take me out once in a while (no place fancy, drinks at the bar was good enough for me)
So as you can see my standards weren’t to high. It was pretty easy to meet a guy that fit all of my “demands”. Needless to say I would pretty much date anybody.
But now, as an older and wiser woman with two kids my standards have been raised quite a bit, as they should. However, it is now much more difficult to find somebody that fits even half of what I believe, most divorced women and even men are looking for. Here is my list:
1. Has to be hot (this hasn’t changed – just our ideas of what is considered “hot”)
2. Has to have a job (not just any job, a good, stable job preferably earning $100k or more a year)
3. Should have a retirement fund that is at least equal to mine.
4. Must have a car (unless you live somewhere like NY – otherwise the car must be at least as nice as mine, preferably nicer)
5. Must be a good father if he has kids, if not must be willing to put up with mine and my kid schedule.
6. Should have some knowledge with regards to fixing small things in and around the house or at the very least know somebody who does.
7. Can do his own laundry.
8. Can cook (not gourmet type, although that would be nice, but at least a few good meals)
9. Is willing to go with the flow and doesn’t complain when things don’t go exactly as planned.
10. Likes to travel and be around other people.
11. Likes to stay home and just be with you.
12. Is good in bed (or at least willing to learn)
13. Someone who will listen to you rant about your crazy family and doesn’t try to “fix” things.
14. They must have your back, no matter what.
15. Should be your best friend
16. Willing to sit and watch stupid t.v. with you (and you are willing to do the same)
17. Should be healthy, doesn’t need to many scrips to get through the day.
18. Is fit, exercises and likes to stay active.
19. A good communicator (or at least willing to learn)
20. Isn’t afraid to show emotion.
This is a pretty good list of what I think we would all like to see in our partners. I don’t think I am being to picky or expecting too much. Having been married and now knowing what a true partner should and shouldn’t be and learning a lot about what I have to offer in the process, I think this list represents what women really want even if they don’t know it. But we must be willing to do the same in return.