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The Gift of Children

I have been given a gift, for which while I am extremely grateful, I am at the same time angry.  Everyday I go to work and try to help parents work out a parenting time schedule.  Usually one in which both parents have equal time with their children.  This likely entails an every other weekend type schedule.  So every other weekend one parent finds themselves without kids. There are two sides to this.  While on the one hand it is nice to have that time alone to do your own thing, go out with friends, hook up with your boy/girlfriend, eat what you want or even nothing at all if you choose or just relax and do nothing.  But on the other hand those “nothing” times can get long and lonely. You are probably missing your kids, especially in the beginning when being without them for long stretches of time is still new and oh so hard.

I haven’t been given that option.  I have my kids 24/7.  I don’t have a chance to miss them.  Now while I am not complaining because I know many of you would prefer to have your kids with you all the time, I have to say I am a bit angry that i have been left essentially holding the bag.  I am responsible for my kids 100% of the time, responsible for housing them, feeding them, chauffeuring them, being present at every single event, school or otherwise, attending meetings, volunteering for school purposes, shopping for them and on and on and on.  All this done around my work schedule while me ex is only responsible for sending me a check every month to help pay for all of this.  Thankfully he has not shirked his responsibility in that area.

I sometimes wish I had someone to help me, someone I could turn to when I am just too tired to go to one more band competition or one more school meeting or even to go to the grocery store, I want someone to have my back the way I have my kids.  I miss it.  While I would never want my ex back in my life that way I just wish he were in my kids’ lives that way.  I want him to step-up and be a dad.  I know this will never happen and the care of our kids will always be on me, I am sad that both he and my kids are missing out.

I know my kids will be gone soon, and I will be missing them and all of the concerts, meetings, and time just spent sitting and talking with them, or watching t.v. with them or riding in the car with them, I will miss it all.  But right now what I would give for just one weekend.  Not too long from now my home will be empty and I will finally know what my client’s go through on a regular basis,  and I will wish for this time back to do it all over again.

Parenting is the hardest job in the world, but definitely the most rewarding if you do it right.  Here’s to every parent that has done it right – cheers!

 “To be in your children’s memories tomorrow you have to be in their lives today”

Barbara Johnson

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